‘How much do you love me?’ Midori asked.
‘Enough to melt all the tigers in the world to butter’, I said.
– Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood (1987)
Happy Valentine’s Day everybody. I hope you are practicing jiai 自愛, or self-love today, and everyday. (The kanji for this idea is the same in Chinese and also happens to be the first character in my name, ‘ai’.) My dear friend Lin (from our little concrete jungle photoshoot) shared a beautiful bilingual post about this concept on her blog, which you can read here.
This space has been a bit stagnant to me the past 2 months. Maybe from a lack of excitement or a natural lull as it occurs to all creative forms. Consistently creating something I am proud of is difficult, and the more drafts I go through, the more I can whittle away the unpublishable or what is simply not quite ready to be shared. I would rather sacrifice quantity than quality, and as I am both self-critical and continuously appraising, I have been collecting photographic ideas and sentiments in my mind for what may come into existence in the future. Even if few people ever see this page, it matters to me that I make something that I am proud of. My best mate Kelly thinks I should combat the artificial norm of only sharing triumphant moments and dreamy vacations on the internet, and while I generally agree with this perspective (sure I have fun, but I don’t post photos of my late nights at the office), I think I will save my daily thoughts for my journal as they may not inspire anyone but me at the moment. Just know that life has been relatively calm over in these parts. Actually, I have been feeling quite inspired and energized today reflecting on what I will be doing this time next year and researching how to further my ultimate dream of a life of international engagement by deepening my multilingual proficiency and pursuing more working opportunities at the intersection of cultures. I am doing some plotting, but I will be patient until I have more concrete plans.
xo your friend alice
p.s. I finished reading Norwegian Wood the day my favorite uncle died, and for that reason, I will never forget it.
p.p.s. While aishiteru 愛してる means ‘I love you’ in Japanese, it is rarely used in spoken communication as it is a very serious, intense proclamation of devotion. Instead, daisuki 大好き is said, which can apply to really loving your partner, or really loving strawberry shortcake.
Location: Tokyo, Japan